24-07-2009, 12:29 AM
28-07-2009, 10:12 AM
Ahh sorry Sen I got confused and thought there was a book discussing ongoing but the goblin story does seem very interesting
28-07-2009, 10:23 AM
Just read the fully updated scenarios and I have to admit I was quite drawn in. It was very different to the standard story that I have so often read. A bit more of detail and attention to the initial paragraphs and there is something interesting here.
Will this be for kids?
Will this be for kids?
28-07-2009, 12:30 PM
(28-07-2009 10:23 AM)burklert Wrote: [ -> ]Will this be for kids?
As Senator's said, 48 times, it will be a "young adult" book, with a PG rating.
28-07-2009, 02:15 PM
(28-07-2009 10:23 AM)burklert Wrote: [ -> ]A bit more of detail and attention to the initial paragraphs and there is something interesting here.
I just want to clarify what you are saying here, for my benefit. Are you saying I need more detail and attention to the initial paragraphs (the story itself, or the description) or that you saw more attention and detail which grabbed your interest?
28-07-2009, 02:50 PM
Sorry I need to be concise in my statements.
I really liked it once it began to describe the goblins chore of gathering the armour, there was a nice pace to it and I was drawn in. The story simply felt like it moved on too quickly from the initial scene setting to me.
I really liked it once it began to describe the goblins chore of gathering the armour, there was a nice pace to it and I was drawn in. The story simply felt like it moved on too quickly from the initial scene setting to me.
28-07-2009, 02:58 PM
I got the same feeling as Burklert. The initial story slowly brings you into the story. It's similar to that feeling you get when watching the Fellowship of the Ring when they're introducing Hobbiton and the hobbits...it's peaceful, simple and fun
28-07-2009, 03:42 PM
Okay, so MSJ likes it as is, and burklert says it goes forward to fast?
Where does it jump for you burklert?
As a side note, I'm not necessarily trying to have an epic tale here. I don't really know how long this will end up getting, but I think getting too long would be a problem with keeping interest and selling to start with.
Where does it jump for you burklert?
As a side note, I'm not necessarily trying to have an epic tale here. I don't really know how long this will end up getting, but I think getting too long would be a problem with keeping interest and selling to start with.
28-07-2009, 04:15 PM
I say get him into the adventure.
28-07-2009, 04:17 PM
Almost there. Just read the latest update and tell me its not worth a little waiting though. I guess there is just too much "story," and not enough "game play" going on yet, eh rojerton?